We have written often about mindfulness and being “in the moment.” People often tend to dwell in the past or the future, and rarely the present, however this moment is the only one you truly have.

Pay attention to your words and those of your loved ones.

When you feel hurt, do you revisit the hurt over and over? “I can’t believe I said that.” “If she hadn’t ___ things would be different.” “You always ____.” These negative statements reflect events that occurred in the past; whether or not they influenced the present the moments are gone. Although you remember what has happened, there is no point in carrying that energy.

Or perhaps you are a worrier. You often think about what might happen in an interview, or with the weather, or not having enough, or whether the new man in your life is “the one.” These thoughts create energy and reactions in your body (increased adrenaline, stress hormones) but they are just thoughts. These events have not happened, and in fact may not happen, and so this energy is created for no purpose.

As the well-known Serenity Prayer goes, it is of great benefit to be mindful of that which you can change and to let go of that which you cannot. You can’t go back in time and say something different, or change the sequence of events which followed. It is done. Learn from the past, but let it go. Likewise, you can make plans, but you can’t control what may or will happen in the future. Plan to meet the new friend but don’t plan what will come of it. Take the job interview but don’t expect the outcome.

It is best we come to peace with what was and let go of those things we cannot change. The same can be said of the future. It is not here therefore, we cannot change or control it. Let’s be here in our present, truly living and enjoying life in its timeless now moments.