Blog
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How to Be Present for Someone in Need
When encountering someone in emotional pain, many people rush to offer well-meant input in an attempt to fix or stop another’s pain, but in most cases, you insert your own beliefs, judgments and emotions into the situation. You might offer unrequested advice, unsolicited comments, and unwanted feedback, even if with the best of intentions. And…
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Why Do We Lie?
Have you noticed that some people do not tell the truth, even when the truth would be easier? Why is that? Untruths come in the form of “white lies,” exaggeration, gossip, misdirection, not telling the whole story, bluffing, and outright lying. There are many reasons for so-called compulsive lying. In some rare cases, this may…
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When Collecting Becomes Hoarding
Many people enjoy collecting items that add pleasure and richness to their lives: figurines, art, keepsakes from memorable travels, matchbooks or coasters. Items are obtained through thoughtful gifts or conscious decisions and displayed with enjoyment. The border can be crossed into hoarding, however, when the desire to have becomes more important than the desire to…
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Negative Emotions in the Workplace
Many of us are blessed to work in healthy environments, with respectful and pleasant coworkers and supervisors. Unfortunately, many are working in less-than-healthy situations, surrounded by negative emotion. How can we stay removed from the negativity? One strategy to dealing with pervasive negativity is to focus on the positive. This does not mean to take…
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What is Spiritual Fitness?
In my last post, I discussed the benefits of physical and mental fitness. Now l will address how to stay spiritually fit. Because we are whole beings (body, mind, soul), the different aspects of self are not separate. The wellness of one aspect directly affects the wellness of all. Too often, we in the Western…
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Fitness Is Not Just Physical
We all know that a healthy diet and regular movement increase our physical fitness. But the physical is only part of our make-up as humans. We are whole beings – body, mind and spirit. (We will discuss feeding the spirit in another blog post.) It is important to keep the non-physical aspects of ourselves fit…
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Why We Drink Alcohol
Nobody knows when humans first discovered the effects of fermented products – the “buzz” that comes from consuming alcohol – but we do know that we have drunk alcohol for thousands of years, just as we have used other mind-altering substances to change our experiences. In our modern society, why do some individuals choose to…
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Which is Better: Self-Confidence or Self-Compassion?
Are you self-confident? Do you feel strong and capable in most situations? Our society praises strong self-esteem and confident people. We are taught to “fake it until you make it” in situations where our confidence might be slipping. But the flip side of that thought pattern is that you are denying your truth in any…
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How Do We Experience Wisdom?
We often hear the phrase “a wise old owl,” or the “wisdom of old age.” But what is wisdom? We may recognize it when we encounter it, but it is not easily defined and cannot be given, only acquired. Generally, knowledge and intelligence are components, as well as good judgment, courage and experience. Certainly practical,…
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When is Being Nice Not a Good Thing?
There is a distinct difference in the underlying meaning of being “kind” vs. being “nice.” Being “nice” implies conformity to society’s definitions of what is pleasing, usually based on a fear of how you are being perceived. Kindness is based on genuine love and compassion for others. It is nice to compassionately listen to a…
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Letting Go of Victim Mentality
Do you identify with being a victim? We are all recipients of bias or prejudice, injustice, or injury in some form. In our society it is more unusual to NOT be a victim of something, than to BE a victim. However not everyone adopts a “victim” mentality, ready to see insult or injury in every…
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The Courage to Feel Fear
How often do you avoid new experiences because you feel worried or afraid that something might go wrong? We have all had the experience of thinking, “I wish I had…” Fear of failure, fear of being noticed, fear of being successful…whatever holds you back, the fearful anticipation of a potentially negative situation prevents you from…