Blog
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Is Self-Care Selfish?
I have posted several times about the importance of self-care. Let’s delve further into the concept and discuss the roots of “selfishness.” Selfishness, in the dictionary definition, means “lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.” A focus only on yourself and your needs and desires is of benefit to…
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Finding Calm in a Storm
In this digital age we are bombarded throughout the day with news – and most of it is bad news. Whether we are immersed in political commentary, natural disasters or more personal upheavals, it is critical to our mental, spiritual and physical health to remain as impartial and calm as we can. We can feel…
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Nurturing and Conscious Parenting
Although the dictionary definition of nurturing is “to care for and encourage the growth or development of,” in psychological terms there is much more to it. In the caregiver-child context, what can be termed “conscious parenting” consists of less of the common authoritarian practice (“Because I said so!”) and more nurturing (“Here’s why.”). This is…
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Self-Judgement and “Should”
Our society demonstrates judgment every day. We judge others’ political opinion, attire and appearance, sexual preference, ethnic background, choice of mate, and so much more. Quick opinions may be formed about people and situations based on nothing more than appearances, and those beliefs are often held in spite of false evidence. Any time you form…
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An Ending or a New Beginning?
We all know that life is a journey of change. If there were no change, there would also be no growth. A well-known proverb tells of a kind-hearted man who opened a cocoon to free the emerging butterfly. In his attempt to help, he instead crippled the butterfly; without the struggle to emerge, the butterfly’s…
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The Fine Art of Forgiving
“Forgive and forget.” “To err is human, to forgive divine.” We’ve all heard these aphorisms, but what is behind these simple words? What is the true meaning of forgiveness? Forgiveness is not an action so much as a state of mind. It is important to understand that when you forgive, you do not forget or…
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Life as Choice Management
Every moment of every day, you make a choice. Do this, or do that. Notice this, or notice that. Say this, or say that. Do you make these choices by default, out of habit, or do you act deliberately and with intention? If you are going to embark on doing something, do it with intention…
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Anger: a Mask for Primary Emotions
Anger is a secondary emotion. When you see the face of fury know there is an underlying unresolved rooted issue, a sense of dissatisfaction with what is. Humans express anger to cover more vulnerable feelings of fear, offense, hurt or a sense of entrapment. The more deeply you feel those hidden emotions, the more intense…
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Being Part of a Life Tribe
What does it mean to have a family, to be part of a tribe? The traditional family unit in many cultures (and in the U.S. in earlier days) consists of many extended family members sharing a household, a multi-generational family group. Of course, in many cultures a tribe is the normal lifestyle – large family…
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Are You a Good Receiver?
Although we are often told “it is better to give than receive,” in order to live a full and balanced life it is important to be able to give and receive. Whether the exchange is of money, time, effort, ideas, love, or any other modality, flow is created by an exchange. You can get an…
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Healing the Loss of a Loved One
When a dear friend or family member dies, we each deal with our grief and sadness in our own way. Grief is a complex emotion, combining physical and psychological energy, and that energy must have an outlet. When you are confronted with the initial experience of loss, it is of course natural to feel shock…
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Human and Animal Relationships
What does one’s relationship with the natural world and animals say about that person’s relationships with other humans? That is the topic of many sociological and anthropological studies. It is clear that human disregard for the sanctity of life is a warning sign. If a person is cruel to animals, there is an increased likelihood…